A New Year

 

Merry Christmas! Happy Holidays!  Welcome, 2015! 

This was a particularly brutal holiday season for me - I was feeling under the weather for a lot of it, and the schedule was unrelenting.  Work was crazy and - most importantly - there was lots of celebrating to attend to.  It all came to a bit of a peak when we arrived at my Grammy's and sat down for Christmas Dinner (me, in crepe sweatpants, which I swore I would never substitute for formalwear), when suddenly Jack was coughing.  And then there it was: vomit all over my place setting.  We recovered by New Year's Eve and headed into 2015 with a refreshed sense of purpose and a new set of goals.  This is the first year in many years that I didn't write down my New Year's resolutions.  They are that concrete.  And the first year ever that my resolutions concerned my family, and not me.  I think I've finally realized that until I can be the leader that my family needs, there isn't enough time for me to lead my own life the way I want to.  I've grown much more patient these past two years.  And I know I can be that leader.

And so, over the holday I appointed myself 'Family CEO'.  I took control of the finances, made meal plans, and instituted a morning schedule.  Everything is running so much more smoothly and everyone is happier and in a better mood.  I read once, maybe five or seven years ago, that when you choose a husband you should consider whether he would make a good business partner, because being part of a family is like running a small business.  I have been so busy that I had been ignoring the needs of the 'family business' and just kind of winging it.  I'm finding that the more organized I am, the happier I am, and the more I can accomplish.  You guys: at 29, I think I'm finally an adult.

Today is our wedding anniversary.  Three years!  And five years since our first real date.  We are celebrating tonight at Babbo with pasta and truffles and red wine.  For our leather anniversary gift, we bought Jack a new pair of leather shoes.  As these three years have passed, I've often felt like the odd man out in my group of friends.  In many ways I envy the freedom of my pals who can run out for dinner at the last minute, or sleep in, or stay late at work to get everything to the place they want it, or have found themselves in dream career positions or on exotic vacations.  In contrast, my life seems simple.  But I'm grateful for the opportunities that marriage has afforded me.  Marriage and motherhood have made me more whole.  But they've also caused me to take the years ahead of me seriously.  I sort of feel that way I did in ninth grade when my double-ivy-league dad looked at my report card and said, "Annie, you have a 77 average.  That's a C+."  And I realized that if I didn't change my attitude and my work ethic, that highschool was going to pass me by.  From that day onwards I got an A on everything I did.  I just hadn't realized how easy it was.  I feel like 2015 might be the year I start getting A's again.

x.

PS - This post is dedicated to Ms. McClain, of California.  Hello, you!  Please don't shed any more tears of disappointment.  I am getting organized over here! That means more posts!

PPS - Photo by the wonderful Richard Jopson (this shot was taken with a vintage Rolleiflex camera - I love the quality of photos taken on film, dont you?  You only get 13 shots on a roll for a Rolleiflex.  So glad we got a keeper!  It's kind of thrilling having something to wait for.)